Milk expiration dates

Tonight I stopped by Meijers to pick up some bread and milk on my way home. It's pretty surreal when you realize that the milk will expire 2 days after I have moved to Ukraine! It's a little overwhelming when you look at it that way too!

There are many things that as I am doing them I wonder if it is the last time... saying goodbyes and slowly starting to shift mentally while raising the last of my monthly support. It is a much more difficult process than I would have ever expected. It's a rollercoaster of emotions with the exhiliration of a dream coming true and at the same time also needing to close many chapters of life here.

Happy New Year! I am so blessed to have many people in my life that care deeply and love much!

What's for dinner?

Last night I had dinner with a good friend and her youngest daughter. I've put together a photo album to walk through when talking with people about what I'll be doing in Kyiv. Even though they are very familiar with my tasks, I walked through the photos with them. At the end I asked if they had any questions.

"What do you eat in Ukraine?" It makes me smile, especially when kids have fun, every day questions... I told her I eat bread with butter and cucmbers for breakfast. Then her ears perked up when I told her you could buy or make pizza and there are 26 McDonald's in Kyiv! Many times on my way to language school I stop and get a cup of coffee and look over my Russian homework before walking into school at McDonalds.

Her eyes lit up as we talked about the 'familiar'. I'm always interested in how each one of us look for points of commonality wherever we are. There is comfort in familiarity. And, sometimes those breif encounters with the familiar gives us the energy and the inquisitiveness to seek the unfamiliar!

Who/What are the Margins?

The margins are the fringe of society. It differs from culture to culture. In Ukraine it is the people that very few want to deal with. Kids who live on the street...Drunks...Drug addicts...People who are dying - both physically and spiritually. There are no really good numbers available to quantify these groups in Ukraine. The government would like to pretend that they are not dirtying up their society and from an onlookers perspective, are hopeful that 'they' will be eliminated through some sort of a natural cleansing process of sorts.

The margins are often people who live with a very close understanding of death. Tonight I went to the World Vision "Experience Africa" exhibit that is touring the country. You check in and get a headset. You then proceed to walk trough while listening to a story of a child from Africa. I fought back tears frequently as I was reminded that she understood the brevity of life. Her father died when she was 5 and then her mother became ill later. I don't want to ruin the experience for those who may go. I will say that the journey was powerful. Maybe in part because I can vividly see many in my mind who have been diagnosed with AIDS. When I hear a child's story from Africa I am reminded of Ukrainians that I know who have also waited in a clinic for test results. They stamped my hand positive when I placed it on a counter... as a part of an experience... I know people who in real life have been stamped with a red HIV + sign and live out the consequences daily.

I wanted to go through to hear another story. But, I couldn't quite do it back to back. I hope to make it back some other night this week. I would strongly encourage anyone who has the opportunity to visit the Africa experience to do so. It is being set up in different locations across America. This week it is at Fair Haven Ministries in Hudsonville daily from 10 am - 8 pm. Walk through and think about who the margins represent. Will you join me in serving the least of these in Ukraine in Jesus' name?

Leaning and Waiting

I've been explaining to many that I have pushed back my departure date from early November to late December. This is challenging for me on several levels. First, in good old American fashion, it's extending the time line which is difficult for my personality... Second, I want to be there. I know I'll miss so many people and things, but that doesn't change my desire. Third, I've just never been very good at waiting... and so, I wait!

A friend's blog reminded me today that there are lots of good things about waiting too. It is not a state of complacency, but a time of deliberateness. And, that one can actually accomplish a lot while you wait. I've moved, am going to move again. Have sold most of my possessions and boxed up those that remain. Have been through several language, mission and cross cultural trainings. Have met a ton of new people and now continue to invite people to be a part of what God is doing in Ukraine through financial partnership.

We wait for bread to raise. For yeast to work. And then for it to bake. It's well worth the wait.

Now I wait for God's continued provision, for open doors and His direction. And I rest, knowing that this too will be worth the wait!

It went so different in my head!

I had moved out of my house amazingly fast! Before I went to Ukraine for 2 weeks. There was one hitch. I kept 'stuff' in my office. The agreement was that I'd remove it 'when I got home'. Well, an afternoon here and a day there, turned into many, many hours of sorting through the mess that started there and then was only complicated when I added more 'stuff' from other areas in the house.

Finally! It is done. Everything is out. I brought a few things to my friends house to sort through. Today I was reading through old journals. I found the following written while I was in Mexico the summer of '99. I had just returned from a trip to Ukraine. It is so fun to look back and see how persistant God is and how involved He is in our lives. Let me share part of the entry:

From June 28, 1999 "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love just as Christ loved us and gave Himslf up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5:1-2

I need to share my heart today. I have said to many people since my cisit to Ukraine that I feel God has blessed me with 3 main ministries in my life: jr. high at Calvary, Ukraine and my job. Since my trip to Ukraine, I feel like many things have a sharper focus in my life. Often, I can't really explain it to people, but You are very real to me this month. I still do and say stupid things - but You are with me. You are tugging at my heart. I want to know how and why. I am seeking exactly what you want me to do. I don't want to take the easy road just because it's comfortable. I honestly and completely want to know what you wnat me to do. I am broken - emotionally, physically and spiritually! I know You desire a broken and contrite heart. I am waiting for Your direction... I need Your direction! Please guide me.

What is inspirational?

Tonight I am wondering about what is inspirational? I went with a couple friends to see Julie and Julia. For those who haven't seen it, the movie is based on a true story of a woman who is turning 30 who is frustrated with her state of life so she decides to cook her way through Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" in a year and blog each day about her experiences.

The movie also tells you the story of Julia Child and her husband while they live in France. She is concerned that she needs something to do, so she enrolls in French Cooking School. Obviously, this changes her life and it also impacts many others too.

As the movie was ending, I was thinking about Julia living in France and feeling like she had 'nothing to do'. And about the readers who followed Julie's blog for a year. So, this all begs the question: What/who inspires you? As I get ready to move to Ukraine, is my life inspirational to Ukrainians? To Americans that I talk with before I leave?

Cooking is wonderful. I love to cook! But, I pray that people are inspired through my life to see my creator...